Nicole Sodoma, a family-law attorney at Sodoma Law in North Carolina, US, and author of Please Don’t Say You’re Sorry, works with many couples going through divorce, and often points them in the direction of divorce coaches to help them through the process. “A divorce coach can help you to identify, and then spend time on the issues and tasks that will matter most to you in the long term, while supporting you with the challenges that you might be grappling with in the present,” she says.
Many lawyers, like Sodoma, now recommend divorce coaches for their clients, even pairing them with suitable experts in some instances, which has aided the perceived legitimacy and popularity of the service.
But there are some risks to bringing a third-party into the divorce process. “Divorce coaches are not licensed and their expertise varies widely,” says Saad. “It is of utmost importance to check your coach’s credentials to make sure that you are in good hands.”
She also points out that, depending on their expertise, divorce coaches might not be able to spot psychological problems affecting a couple’s dynamics or complex legal issues that could cause a problem if missed.
‘Divorce has not defined me’
Katie believes using a coach completely changed the trajectory of her post-divorce life. Two years ago, shortly after her divorce was finalized, she met a new partner. She credits the coaching sessions with helping her to feel empowered, confident and resilient enough to enter into a new relationship.
To others considering divorce coaching, she says although it can be expensive, she believes that it is a worthwhile investment. She argues her sessions meant that she was able to make the most of her even more expensive legal assistance by turning up to appointments with her lawyer fully prepared. But she maintains she is most grateful that she invested in a divorce coach because of the impact that it had on her as an individual.
“You may be broken and hurt, but eventually, when you are ready for the change you deserve, coaching is the help that you need to move forward,” she says. “Divorce has not defined me, and I feel that the future is bright.”